我懷念的

誰能夠划船不用槳？

誰能夠揚帆沒有風向？

誰能夠離開好朋友，沒有感傷？

記得當年F4的時候，我利用這首歌把很多朋友都弄哭了，其中幾個還哭得不成人形。

約定會再次見面，約定永遠的友情，然後離開了學校。

結果，好幾個朋友在新校園沒有兩個星期就回來了，因為不習慣那種離鄉背井去讀書的情況。

沒有回來的，只有三個（後來又回來了一個），都是女生。

想起當年的天真，許下單純的承諾，雖然大家都知道那是謊言，可是依然甘心被欺騙。

如果當時不是因為她，我看，我不會有一絲不捨，因為當時的我知道，有聚有散。

離別的鬱悶，不過只是為再相逢的歡愉在做對比而已。

那是5、6年前的事吧？

可是，我卻覺得已經過了好久好久...

當年的好朋友，如今依然還是嗎？

我不知道...

可是，我不會忘記任何一個當年一起笑一起哭的朋友。

就算友情已經被歲月磨滅，回憶，你們依然在那裡。

朋友，最近過得還好嗎？

The Next Thing

I am so slack!!!

I am supposed to do something, during this very moment, right?

Yet I don't feel like doing anything, not at all!!!

That's too bad...

Had been almost a year since my last visit home, guilty I feel, but no choice.

I think I really need to show myself up before I was totally forgotten by the folks there.

But that's quite impossible, though I don't think there's anything that's impossible.

Anyway, Hope so I could arrange a day or two for my trip home.

That's not a deal, but a commitment!

I think I really need to improve my oral communication skills, in order for me to perform.

Though, that's too TOUGH for me!

I know I am weak, and I know I really need to upgrade myself.

Yet, I have no confidence to really achieve something in this...

Hopefully, my module would really help me...

Arhhh... I am moody again, yet I don't know exactly what happened to me...

Is there a cure? I really need some healing before I could get onto my feet to continue.

I don't like being a hindrance, but somehow I always disturb others...

Shittt...

Forget it...

Friends, I think I lost faith in friendship...

Good luck, everyone!

Good luck, my dream...

壞小孩

我不是個好孩子。

最近因為上課的關係，頭痛似乎時常發作，間接影響了自己的情緒。

...尤其是和媽說話的時候。

溝通沒有想像中簡單，因為你不能直接從思緒中擷取出很多可能牽涉到多方面的事情，並說出口。

我承認我習慣甚麼都不說，因為我習慣花很多時間沈浸在我的思想裡。

也許，我真的不習慣被人管教，尤其不喜歡別人把我當成小孩。

“明天沒有上課嗎？”

也許就只是很單純的問候，對我來說，那是一種不信任。

不信任我的能力...

那樣，我真的會很累...

休息是為了走更長的路。

我時常都在休息、放空，因為我覺得我比很多人都弱。

所以，我不喜歡別人在我休息的時候打擾。

沈默的時候，就讓我一個人，不然我應該都會失控發飊的。

功課方面，我似乎應該花更多心思。

加油吧...

Headache!

Well, I think I had forgotten my 2 years of studies in TARCollege.

I am so stupid that I even forgot the simplest things about Mechanics and Maths.

What the... Really need to put in more efforts...

It was my birthday, on the 18 of April, when it wasn't an unusual day, at all.

Out of my expectation, couples of friends remembered my birthday and sent me regards.

Thanks a lot, I treasured your greetings so much.

I would wanna type their names here, but I think that wasn't a good idea.

I would wanna say I had received my best gifts for this birthday;

I gifted myself a MacBook Aluminium, which I really like it so much that I would never wanna go back to Windows again.

And Singapore Polytechnics offered me the course I had been dreaming for, though I have to start it all over again from diploma. It doesn't matter.

I think I would need to take in more water, plain one, as I was feeling dizzy after a few hours for classes.

Am I that weak? I think so... but I hope I wasn't...

Hope that won't bother me anymore...

SP Flag Day 2009

It was a boring event, but a fun day, though.

My class was being located in Jurong East, and I was almost walking the whole morning.

I would say I will never do this without this event.

And I really like to walk, alone.

While I could think, I could smile, I could look at the sky, I could even look at the traffic around.

I really had fun, a lot of fun.

Hahahaa~

I raised 22.20SD, quite surprisingly, though I spent most of my time walking, and I even stopped a lot earlier than the promised time.

I would like to say anyone who donated, and I really wanna say that, Singaporeans are FRIENDLY, in someways.

I wouldn't regret, but I won't miss it either.

That's quite a good experience to actually learn to deal with strangers.

I like it! HAHA~~

Friendship?

......

......

好想紀錄下一點甚麼。

腦海裡尋尋覓覓，卻找不到一絲值得留下的回憶。

是我沒有了甚麼值得被紀錄的記憶嗎？我想是吧...

日子還是一天一天地過。

不同的是，之前的我等待命運，現在的我等待改變命運。

我真的可以嗎？我還不知道。

也許我不行，可是我依然希望去嘗試。

我知道的，是我無論如何都不可以放棄的約定。

因為，我已經失去了很多時間，也犧牲了很多事情。

友誼啊，似乎就沒有天長地久。

愛情，更加吧...

我似乎悲觀，可是我不希望朋友也一樣。

我知道，我選擇一個人無助，可是，我不會讓我朋友無助。

傷心的時候，讓我安慰你，可以嗎，朋友？

雖然，我沒有這樣的資格，我相信...

看來啊，我還要學習好多好多東西。

好好充實自己，好好長大。

如果可以的話，真的希望可以讓回憶完完全全被洗滅。

至少，不再讓記憶困擾，不再為了以前而害怕。

朋友，你說是嗎？

雖然，我不認為你會看見，對嗎？...

瘋狂日記

最近都一個人宅在家裡，除了悶字閒字真的想不到別的字可以形容。

真後悔沒有回去KL，現在在這裡都快發霉了。

但也許沒有回去是對的，因為錢包最近扁得都可以塞進光碟機裡了。

善哉善哉，怎麼我最近那麼落魄啊？

最近（其實一直都是）很積極地想推動（沒有在）身邊的朋友們談戀愛，想說讓他們的生活多一點色彩，不是單調的只有書和做不完的作業。

才發現，朋友們似乎都不曾在乎過，看來我真的是瞎操心了咧。

可是，我依然希望朋友們能早點交男女朋友咧。

人生啊，短短幾十年匆匆，錯過了，可能就沒有了。

緣份來的時候不會告訴你的，別在它離開了之後，才說那是你的錯。

咳zzz...

很努力的想學很多東西，可是學習是要錢的！！！

也很貪心的想要買很多東西，可是那些都是錢來的！！！

現實就是錢錢錢，沒有錢可能就甚麼都做不了了。

也許，真的要好好計畫下自己的開銷了...

別想那麼多了，反正明天睡醒後，太陽還是從東邊升起的。

加油啊我的朋友，加油啊誰誰！！！

屋頂

這兩天的情緒有點失常，好像有甚麼病毒入侵了，不由自主地總是胡思亂想，卻連自己都不知道自己在想甚麼。睡不著，似乎是病毒帶來的後遺症。

是因為昨天和炳森的對話嗎？

是因為我對命運的無力嗎？

還是，因為她的若即若離？只是我想太多，是嗎？

不想再依賴文字的力量，把自己的一切留下，不想讓自己留下痕跡。

是我太懦弱，我知道，那些並不是最差最壞的情況。

可是，接二連三，我沒有辦法完全承受...

曾經喜歡［屋頂］這首歌。喜歡它的意境，喜歡歌詞，喜歡和音。

卻發現，現實和歌詞不只是兩回事，還是兩個世界的事。

我變得冷靜，選擇沈默，學會放手，因為傷心過，執著過，後悔過，原諒過。

我無法橫渡兩個世界，所以我不會再浪費時間，去尋找那個世界。

如果，你有幸可以到那個世界，請為我細細品嘗那裡的舒適美滿，好嗎？

KNOWING

This is a comment based on the movie KNOWING, starred by Nicholas Cage.

He was a great father, caring so much for his son, to even let him go for his safety.

He took any measure that could save his son's life, even to give up his own...

Frankly, that was quite a nice show, a little bit too real for the tragedies, reminded me of The Final Destination 3 when the subway crashed.

Is there angels? In the movie, the angels turn out to be aliens, they take UFOs - in my point of view, much like Noah's Ark - to save lives from the greatest disaster of the Earth. However, they took only the kids, which are Nicholas' son in the show, Caleb and daughter of the Diana, the leading actress of the movie (I supposed), Abby. Both of them are gifted to be able to hear the angels' whispers, and most likely, they were sent to Eden, to start the cycle of human history once again.

I would like this story based on its view of death. The climax of the show turns in when Nicholas had to decide to let his son aboard the Ark - the UFO - led by the angels, and decided to apologize to his parents, whose he had been avoiding them for year. They died together at last, at the greatest disaster. It's not when you are dying that makes you think, since we just can't manipulate, but it's what you do and who you are with.

I would like this movie, as a show, not to entertain, but to think.

我想我是太無聊了

Well, things turn out fine and I am really good.

But... I am overbored... Yes, I think I am.

I am waiting for the school to start, I know I am, but I feel like I lost something.

What's the "something" really bothers me, a lot...

I think I was missing her, like I did before, and the feeling haunts me like it had been waiting for so long. I think that's not a good sign, though.

如果思念是一種病，我看我似乎已經無藥可救，真是折磨，咳...

偏偏，不像以往，除了坐立難安之外，卻沒有任何一種在想念她的跡象。

所以，我想，我似乎無聊得有點頭昏腦脹了。

日子除了等待就是無聊... 說真的，還真的非常不習慣，偏偏天氣蔭晴不定，我不能貿貿然地跑去游泳，也沒有多餘的錢可以一個人去看戲吃飯，終日待在家裡做宅男，病入膏肓似乎無可避免。

犯賤到...

New Life

This is the first post I ever update to Blogger.com.

Had been a while since the very last time I posted something on the net, not used to it anymore, I would wanna say.

Things are getting better lately. No more Despair, no more hopeless, but lots of fun and days seem to be great enough.

Wow Wow Yeah Yeah, I would wanna sing a song now, haha...

... A new start, doesn't always be a long one.

Hopefully, I would be able to write more the next time I update here.